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My Fella was a player and now its coming back to haunt, not him - but me

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My Fella was a player and now its coming back to haunt, not him - but me Empty My Fella was a player and now its coming back to haunt, not him - but me

Post  Claire-Joannah-Rhymes2b Tue Mar 02, 2010 8:54 am

Sorry girls - i didnt know whether to put this in the 'shoulder room' or the rant corner - but i thought its prob more of a rant than anything else Mad
Well as the story goes, I knew my h2b has abit of a chequered past, when the mother of his kids went off with his best mate, he decided to play the field a little, which is all good and well if your not hurting anyone else.
Anyway it all started off when i started taking my daughter to pre school last year - the managers daughter was his last girlfriend before me, i first found it a little strange but i just thought 'everyone has a past, and it was before me so it dosent matter'
Anyway so some of you know i have not long started a new job where over 300 people have been employed at a new hospital - now you'd think, with all those people employed from all over the place - what are the chances - well.... the first 'girl' sprung up about 3 weeks ago - Itis someone h2b had quite a sleazy relationship with ( i say sleazy as she was engaged to someone else) he slept with this girl on a couple of occasions and guess what? She works in our finance department!
The second came about through facebook, a girl from one of our units added me, H2b seen it, and guess what? He says he knows her from somewhere but swears he didnt sleep with her ( yet he knows personal stuff about her that only you would know if you were close to her - its hard to explain, but i know hes lying)
Anyway ive tried to once again put it to the back of my mind - Until i got an add last night from a girl in our hospitality dept - this morning h2b says 'how do you know **** *****?' I replied that she was from work - surprise surprise...hes had only what i can call, 'dealings' with her of a personal kind too.
AHHHH iam starting to feel embarassed as i talk to the 2 of these girls on a regular basis - both on a professional and personal level - i just feel like people are going to start laughing at me soon at me for being with such an ex player. I know it was his past - but its still not nice.
Ive spoken to him about it, and although he says hes cringing too and giving me lots of reasurance about it - i know secretly hes loving the fact he has so many notches on his bedpost!
Iam just waiting for the next one to come out of the 'woodwork' now. How shameful Crying or Very sad


Last edited by Missfunkyass (admin) on Tue Mar 02, 2010 11:17 am; edited 2 times in total
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Post  zepsgal (admin) Tue Mar 02, 2010 9:22 am

Sweetie, the problem isnt his past, its that his past is your present!! If he had slept with girls you didnt work with now it wouldnt really be an issue for you.

You know there is absolutley nothing you can do or say to make this better, but at the end of the day we have all got ex partners or one night stands under our belt.

If only his wasnt so close....... Rolling Eyes
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Post  Claire-Joannah-Rhymes2b Tue Mar 02, 2010 9:29 am

I know hun - it just seems where ever we go he has slept with someone or been on a 'date' or something!
God it sounds awful dosent it! I just dont know what i can do about it - like you say there is nothing i can do, iam not innocent when it comes to my past but i dont think he'd be happy if the boot was on the other foot...actually i know he would be livid! - but i know for a fact one of them girls feels really awkward now too! Rolling Eyes
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Post  zepsgal (admin) Tue Mar 02, 2010 9:43 am

Oh I would just hate to know all of h2b's ex'es!!! He used to go out with this girl we all went to school with, even now I cant stand her! Want to claw her eyes out! Twisted Evil
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Post  Irish_Bride_2_b Tue Mar 02, 2010 9:52 am

ooo, its a little awkward isnt it??

Well, as Zeps says, there is nothing you can do about it, and he is obv a changed person now. We all go a little 'free and easy' at times, but its a real shame that they are so close.....

Mind you, it could be worse - he could work with them - like i do with an ex of mine - affraid
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Post  missusS Tue Mar 02, 2010 10:47 am

Aw, it's horrible when ex's crawl out of the woodwork! try not to get upset about it, like has been said -everyone has a past. As long as things stay amicable and nothing nasty is being said or done to you try to rise above it, I know exactly how you feel, one of hubbys ex's has given us a lot of grief over the last year, her and her pal phoning me, writing and emailing with lots of nasty malicious stuff to us and our contacts on facebook, he says she is just someone he had a fling with-she seems to think differently, but that is another story! You are the one he wants to with and has chosen to marry, so chin up x
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Post  Claire-Joannah-Rhymes2b Tue Mar 02, 2010 11:20 am

Oh god Missus - Thats sounds nasty - Have you blocked her~? Report the abuse on facebook and report her babe - knowone should have to put up with that sh*t!
Ah thanks everyone - i think itis something iam just gonna try and have to get used too! I dont see what other option i have, i just didnt imagine that the man i was going to end up marrying was such a ta*t in his previous life style Rolling Eyes
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Post  Sarah sajo Tue Mar 02, 2010 1:31 pm

Like the others have said there is not alot that can be done about it and its all in his past but not very nice for you to have to deal with, if everyone is being ok about it then just go with the flow, if any akwardness starts just try and brush it off and make a joke of it xx
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Post  MrsM2B (SmileyBride) Wed Mar 03, 2010 8:43 am

My H2B is still close to loads of friends from school and they're really good friends of mine now too

He's slept with at least 4 of them and one of those is now my best friend and will be my BM - from my point of view, I wouldn't care at all... like the others said; he's with you now, and wasn't with you then.

Just laugh about it and be happy you have such a catch Wink

xx

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Post  Kaz&Rich Sun Mar 07, 2010 3:55 pm

Hun he is marrying you!!!! Do you trust that these girls are in his past? If so then you don't have anything to worry about - if these ppl know what a player he was then they will be looking at you in awe that you have 'tamed' him!!!

i had to chuckle reading MrsM2B's post cos it is soooooo similar to me! I went to my best male friends wedding a few years ago (i am god mum to both his kids) and was sat there thinking, christ I am a slapper, i've been out with;

The Groom
both ushers
had a kiss with the best man years ago whilst very drunk
and a couple of other randoms who i didn't even realise my mate knew til they turned up at the reception!

H2B thought it was hilarius esp as i am only his 3rd partner (he's 51 bless him)
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Post  Claire-Joannah-Rhymes2b Mon Mar 08, 2010 7:13 am

Aw bless! Haha
Yeah i trust him - he wouldnt have the guts to cheat on me lol...
Its just crap how theve all seemed to congregate under the one roof! Its hard talking to them now as i dont know what there thiking and they feel akward to me..maybe one day ill just blurt it out in the open and make a joke of it - least that way then its not awkward!? Nevermind like you say i will just be proud ive manged to tame him haha - ooohhh i bet h2b was soo proud to be seen with you - knowing he had got 'the girl' lol xxx
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Post  Kaz&Rich Thu Mar 11, 2010 3:19 pm

Wait til you are in a more social setting and then just come out with something like "so of was having copped off with my h2b part of the conditions of employment?' and grin, it'll lighten the mood (hopefully)
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Post  MrsM2B (SmileyBride) Fri Mar 12, 2010 12:39 pm

oooh, I like that one!
Or turn to them and ask; "has anyone here not had my future husband ? ! Wink

They're probably just feeling a little anxious that you'll hate them!

xx

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